Everything here is arranged by how long a couple has been married, because that is the thing a reader already knows when they arrive. Guides and short answers sit together on one path rather than in two separate systems. Start at the stage you are buying for.
Getting engaged
The stage with no rulebook. Custom, budgets and card wording, all before anyone's booked a venue.
- Who buys the engagement gift? The loose custom, explained.
- Engagement gift ideas. What to give a newly engaged couple, by budget.
- Personalised engagement presents. What "personalised" buys you over an off-the-shelf gift.
- What to write in an engagement card. Congratulate, keep it brief, mean it.
The wedding
Gift ideas, card wording and practical guidance for guests and couples.
- Wedding gift etiquette. Registries, timing, and thank-you norms.
- How much to spend. Why there's no fixed figure, and how to decide.
- Wedding gifts for the couple. What to give the couple themselves, by budget.
- Unique wedding gifts. The gifts that are not on the registry.
- Personalised wedding gifts. Made for one couple and nobody else.
- What to write in a wedding card. Short, warm, sincere: what works and what to skip.
- How to write wedding vows. The five-part structure, real examples, and what most couples get wrong.
The first years
Years one to five, plus the free lookup and the two lists that disagree about them.
- The UK anniversary list, year by year. Every year and its material as Debrett's gives it, and where the lists disagree.
- Which anniversary is it? (free tool). Free tool: enter the years and get the material, the name, and whether it gets a royal message.
- Anniversary gifts by year. The traditional UK list, year by year, and the keepsakes that fit each.
- The year-by-year list. The full traditional list, year by year.
- What the symbols mean. How the tradition works, and where the modern list disagrees.
- First Christmas married. For the newlyweds, or for each other: made from the wedding itself.
- Christmas gifts for couples. A Christmas gift for a couple, made from their own wedding.
- The 1st: paper. Paper, traditionally. Clocks on the modern list.
- The 2nd: cotton. Cotton, traditionally. China on the modern list.
- The 3rd: leather. Leather anniversary ideas, with guidance on choosing materials.
- The 4th: flowers, fruit - or linen. The year the sources disagree, and how to tell which is British.
- The 5th: wood. Wood, and why it is the fifth rather than the sixth.
- What to write in an anniversary card. How to mark the years without sounding generic.
The milestones
The years that get a name and a party, ten through seventy, and where the King's message starts.
- The 10th: tin. Tin, traditionally. Diamond on the modern list.
- The 15th: crystal. Crystal anniversary gifts and what to check when choosing them.
- The 20th: china. China anniversary ideas, from decorative pieces to tableware.
- The 25th: silver. Silver, on both lists.
- What the silver wedding is. What the 25th means.
- The 30th: pearl. Pearl, traditionally. Diamond on the modern list.
- What the pearl wedding is. What the 30th means.
- The 35th: coral. Coral, and which of it is CITES-listed.
- The 40th: ruby. Ruby, on both lists.
- What the ruby wedding is. What the 40th means.
- The 50th: gold. Gold, on both lists, and the Royal card rule.
- What the golden wedding is. What the 50th means.
- The diamond wedding at sixty. The 60th, and the first year the King sends a card.
- The 65th: no material. The year the British list skips, and what that frees you to do.
- Platinum at seventy. Seventy years, and the rule that keeps going after it.
- When to apply for the King’s message
- How the portrait is made. How the portrait is made, start to finish.